How Leaders Can Resolve Conflicts - "Life is the art of encounter" an Analysis by Fr. Jean-Marie Bilwala Kabesa
By Fr. Jean-Marie Bilwala Kabesa, priest and freelance journalist, Montreal, August 9, 2025
Introduction
Conflict is a common and inevitable part of social and corporate life. It is part of human relationships, whether with oneself or with others, including companions and organizations. Encountering otherness can be advantageous or disadvantageous. People adopt various means to regulate conflict. "Life is the art of encounter, even though life is full of disagreements" (Fratelli Tutti, n. 215).
In this article, I remind my readers that interpersonal conflict is an integral part of life that requires management. The article begins with an introduction. Then, I will present definitions of conflict from various researchers. Finally, I will analyze interpersonal conflicts and draw conclusions.
A Look at the Definition of Conflict
The term "conflict" comes from the Latin word conflictus, the past participle of the verb confligere. This verb is composed of con (together) and fligere (to fight). Originally, the word "conflict" meant "shock," "struggle," or "combat." However, some previous research examining the notion of conflict from this angle has defined it differently. For example, researchers Tjosvold (1990) and Kellermann (1996) have pointed out that conflict is a confrontation between two individuals who are involuntarily unable to meet their expectations.
Other researchers, such as Appelberg, Romanov, Heikkilä, and Koskenvuo (1996) — cited by Bao, Y. S., Zhu, F. W., and Hu, Y. —, and Cui (2016), have argued that conflict is a determinant of an inability to work (Appelberg et al., 1996) and that others (Oi-Ling et al., 2004) have identified it as a predictor of work-related injuries.
Other researchers, such as Jehn and Bendersky (2003) and Bréard and Pastor (2007), consider conflict to be a series of disagreements or incompatibilities in opinions and principles. According to Hocker and Wilmot (2014), it becomes "a struggle expressed between two or more interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, limited resources, and interference by the other side in achieving their goals."
Interpersonal conflicts
Of the many typologies of conflict, I have chosen that of Marsan (2005). It encompasses intrapersonal, intrapsychic, interpersonal, intragroup, intergroup, and organizational conflicts. With this in mind, this article will focus on interpersonal conflicts.
In today's society, conflict is generally associated with negative concepts such as violence, aggressiveness, and war. When unmanaged, conflict implies a notion of violence. However, according to Chomé (2009), conflict can lead to progress and enrichment when it is regulated with respect for oneself and others. The term "conflict" was first applied to interpersonal relationships in the 17th century. It refers to "an adversarial relationship between two or more parties concerning irreconcilable differences relating to matters that are mutually significant to the parties involved" (Rioux & Redekop, 2013, p. 1).
Interpersonal conflicts significantly impact members and the organization. Organizations can benefit from conflicts, which are not necessarily violent or negative, as long as members develop the skills to resolve and manage them. According to Runde and Flanagan (2008), those who succeed are those who embrace conflict and use it to inspire leadership in difficult situations. Effective leadership styles are essential to organizational success (Latham & Vinyard, 2004).
As social and relational beings, all members of an organization experience conflict, whether at work or in the community. While most prefer peace and harmony, they sometimes find themselves in uncomfortable conflict situations. These conflicts can stem from the member himself, his relationships with colleagues, or his relationship with authority. This aligns with Hocker and Wilmot's (2014) discussion that a person cannot live without conflict unless they have no relationships, family, work, or community.
Various factors can cause a member or members of an organization to come into conflict with a colleague or manager. These causes include differences in culture, identity, and opinion; communication problems; a lack of relational sensitivity; race; jealousy; hatred; envy; generational or tribal affiliation; disagreement; relationship problems; and even Greenleaf calls "lack of leadership" (Greenleaf, 2002, p. 240).
According to a study by Curseau (2011), cited by Hocker and Wilmot (2014), when managers ignore relationship problems within an organization, the conflict remains latent and becomes more toxic. Managers have a duty to ensure the organization's proper functioning, first for themselves and then for its members. Their primary mission is to maintain unity in diversity, not to revel in the pride of being a leader or authority figure.
Municchielli's (2012) research shows that authority can be a major cause of conflict within an organization. According to Municchielli, when someone in a position of authority lacks the proper relational sensitivity or leadership style, their governance can become autocratic. This leadership style generates frustrations and resentments, which subsequently create conflicts between members and between members and their manager. Furthermore, when authority is not exercised fairly, there are unfortunate and visible consequences.
Authority figures may show "preferences" for a particular employee or place more trust in some than in others. Without realizing it, they favor some employees over others. Jealousies form among employees who have a hard time with what they consider injustice. Those who feel devalued may become aggressive toward the manager's favorites. If they can and it is dangerous, they will start conflicts with their privileged colleagues. (Municchieri, 2012, p. 20).
In any organization, members may be afraid to address an issue because they prefer to avoid controversy and maintain peace.
Out of fear of the manager, members may mask the problems they encounter, whether personal or relational, with behaviors that appear positive. They always present a positive image, acting as if there were no problems. According to Engelhard and Lacourcelle (2005), the accumulation of problems, unwelcome exchanges, and frustrations generates psychological tension. These issues can fester and lead to conflicts, which may be personal or interpersonal.
In short, at a certain point in life, people need to "get closer, express themselves, listen to each other, look at each other, get to know each other, and try to understand each other..." (Fratelli tutti, n. 198).
Several personal development tools are available to us. In this article, we will discuss a powerful tool for personal development: the "Johari Window."
Johari Window (Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham in 1955)The Johari Window is a personal development tool that increases self-awareness. It consists of four zones:
1. The public area: This is information known to everyone. This area corresponds to information that is known to everyone, such as our career, studies, or marital status. Examples include our career, studies, and personal situation (e.g., marital status). In short, it represents how others perceive us.
2. Hidden Area: This is our secret garden. It contains information that we don't feel is necessary to share with others or haven't seen fit to reveal. For instance, you may have never revealed, out of modesty, that altruism plays a significant role in your life and that you spend your weekends helping the most disadvantaged. The hidden area is fueled by both conscious actions and unconscious reflexes.
3. The blind zone is particularly interesting. It represents the image that others have of us, but we are unaware of it. This image is essentially due to our unconscious actions: nonverbal communication, slips of the tongue, and language tics.
4. The unknown zone: We all have untapped potential and talents that we have not yet expressed, as well as desires and needs that we keep buried within us without realizing it. This area contains information that is unknown to us and our loved ones.
Conclusion
We have reached the end of our article on leaders' ability to resolve conflicts within an organization. By "leaders," I mean anyone responsible for serving others. Since my priestly ordination, I have seen that it only takes one negative interaction between two or more people for a conflict to emerge. The same is true in all organizations.
I strongly emphasize the existence of interpersonal conflicts in social life and, especially, in the exercise of authority within organizations. As one might expect, interpersonal conflicts in organizations are frequent and even inevitable. Their consequences are significant and can be either predictable or unpredictable. Interpersonal conflict itself can be positive or negative. Based on human life experiences, it is sometimes desirable to be in conflict with a person in order to avoid disastrous consequences that could arise from a relationship with them. Several factors can cause interpersonal conflict. Examples include a lack of communication, a lack of self-esteem, jealousy, hatred, and personality differences.
On the other hand, interpersonal conflict calls into question the existing order and can even create a "psychological illness." Members then opt for different management strategies, such as open communication, negotiation, mediation, avoidance, reconciliation, dialogue, confrontation, war, dismissal, and punishment. Pope Francis recommends dialogue, saying: "Persevering and courageous dialogue does not make the headlines like disagreements and conflicts do, but it quietly helps the world live better than we can imagine." (Fratelli Tutti, n. 198).
In short, interpersonal conflicts are an integral part of human relationships. Understanding their causes and consequences, as well as developing communication and conflict resolution skills, is key to fostering healthy, productive relationships. Proper management can lead to growth and a better environment. Proper management of interpersonal conflict can also improve personal health because I believe it weighs heavily on a person, affecting their emotional well-being and psyche. If not managed properly, conflict can harm an organization and its members in the short or long term. Those involved no longer see any possibility of dialogue, understanding, or communication. The climate of trust deteriorates, values and responsibilities are shaken, and the result is lower productivity, decreased motivation and collaboration, reduced performance, stress and tension, and strained relationships that lead to difficult collaboration. Sometimes, we see lies, deceit, and unhealthy schemes intended to damage the targeted person's credibility, reputation, and even life. However, Pope Francis has warned us against such behavior toward a brother or sister. "Whoever builds a wall will end up a prisoner of the walls they have built, deprived of horizons" (Fratelli Tutti, n. 27).
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